Well the Chess the cat team has returned from
their Canada Day road trip. Up to Ottawa for the weekend and back in
Hamilton for the 1st of July. Lovely. The fish were jumping and the
jacks were flapping all weekend long and I've got the pictures to prove it.
We started out on the Friday night from Hamilton
bound for Ottawa. The trip up was pretty uneventful other than the
fact that Freeze brought every CD he owned but forgot the one disc we
wanted to hear in his player at home.
When we arrived in Ottawa it was 4 in the morning.
Tao was expecting us but you wouldn't have known it because all the lights
in his apartment were turned off and repeated rings on his apartment bell
went unanswered. Being the resourceful lot we are, we decided to
sleep in our rental car until Tao remembered to come let us in.
Freeze decided to set up camp on top of the car much to the delight of the
daily morning commuters.
Tao couldn't sleep all day and he soon staggered
down to let us in.
After a restful night spent sleeping in and on top
of a car, we were ready to paint the town red. I've never felt more
raring to pound the pavement. Tao suggested some delicious Chinese
buns would be a great start to the day so we headed off to Chinatown.
And where better to buy baked goods than at the Pink Panda Video store?
After our meal we did a little shopping before heading back to Tao's
apartment.
Even though we were in the Ottawa Capital Region on
the Canada Day long weekend, we decided that the best way to spend our
time was by playing Wrestlemania X8 on the Gamecube. Eight hours
later and it was time for some shuteye but Tao had forgotten to set up the
tents in the backyard so we had to do it by moonlight. Luckily Tao
had a lot of experience pitching tents and the operation went smoothly.
The next day, Tao surprised us with a delicious meal
of flapjacks and bacon and eggs. Starsmars helped out. Her
secret technique is cooking the bacon in the sausage grease and then
cooking the eggs in the bacon grease. The breakfast was great but I
slipped off of my chair on more than one occasion. After several
more hours of Gamecube we began to wonder if it was worth it to drive over
500 miles to play video games. We soon came to a consensus that it
was. We then began to argue whether or not it was worth it to drive that
far to play one video game over and over again. We agreed that when
it was Wrestlemania X8 it would be worth a drive of 650 plus miles, which
was well above the actual 500 mile distance we covered.
We started feeling a little guilty about sitting in
the apartment all day and Freeze felt downright unpatriotic so despite it
being 5 in the afternoon we decided we should ignite some fireworks.
Then it would be right back to the Cube with a clear conscience.
After the fireworks we felt better about ourselves
and our country so it was time for some table matches all around. A
couple of hours later we decided that since Aristotle wasn't able to make
it up on the bus we figured we might as well start heading back home that
night. But before we did why not enjoy a fine film? I was all
for watching the Sopornos because I'd heard so much about it but Tao
explained that this wasn't the HBO series but something quite different
and so he suggested The Luhzin Defense. If you're not a chess fan
you'll probably enjoy this movie but if you are a chess fan and
have the opportunity to watch this movie with other fans of our great
sport then you'll love this movie. We never laughed so hard
in all our lives pointing out errors and just making witty comments in
general. The Luhzin Defense is obviously based loosely on the life
of Alexander Alekhine and so for that we had to give it high marks.
But this movie also included some of the most inaccurate portrayals of a
chess tournament ever committed to film including a Word Championship
match that was kept going even after one of the two players was dead and
buried. I mean I've heard of adjournments but the guy was dead! And
buried! What were the organizers hoping would happen?
This movie did however, inspire us to start filming our own chess movie.
Once we're done it will be posted to the media page. Watch for it.
Talk is cheap and a picture's worth a thousand words
and quite a bit of bandwith as well so hopefully they've all loaded in the
time it took you to read this.
Ahh. A road trip. Is there anything
more exciting than setting out for God knows where with nothing but you
and open road as far as you can see? Before long we needed gas
so Freeze decided to fill up. Unfortunately, Freeze was
a little more tired than he thought. Here he is pouring litre
after litre of precious, precious gasoline all over the ground.
A little of Tao Jones' Southern
hospitality. Since Tao didn't feel like coming down to open the
door for us, he was gracious enough to let Freeze sleep on the top of
his car instead.
Starsmars: If you
don't get your hand off my ass I'll rip it off.
Tao Jones: Agreed.
Well since it was the Canada Day weekend we had to
explode some colored gunpowder. Here's the Jackpot
Fountain made by the good people at the Vulcan
Fireworks Company. "Made for use in Canada only." Nice of
the Chinese to produce a product that they themselves wouldn't dare
use.
Knowing Tao as well as I do --what
I used to call 'Firecracker Day', Tao still calls 'Light
my Dad's Pants on Fire Day'--I decided to be
cautious and take up a perch somewhat back from the proceedings.
Discretion being the better part of
valor...
Ah ha! For a Vulcan Jackpot
Fountain this looks suspiciously like somebody simply threw a few
crummy fireworks in a colorful, cardboard tube. I'd never have
believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes. Doesn't Made in
China mean anything anymore?
Tao is always extremely cautious
when it comes to the handling of hazardous materials. Here he
prepares to dispose of his Berry Bruiser Slurpee.™
Hmmm? What's this?
After deciding to dispose of still-smoking fireworks in a public
garbage can in the middle of a children's playground, Tao
becomes fixated on something shiny.
Well, well, well. Empty
liquor bottles. Now what would they be doing in a playground
garbage can?
Tao especially likes the tag line
"Strong Beer". Oh well. Whatever they're doing here the
municipal sanitation department will be sure to pick them up soon
enough.
What's this? Everyone knows
there isn't any garbage collection on a weekend. I don't think
these gentlemen work for the sanitation department at all.
After allowing us to snap a
few keepsake photos for our albums, our young friends proceeded to
dump cases of empty bottles into our can. We weren't sure what
we had stumbled into here but it was obviously gang-related.
This one seems to be the leader and
the most dangerous of the bunch.
The next day, just before leaving.
Here's Tao hinting in his typically clumsy way that he's got a crush
on me.
After all the fun and games were
through it was time to leave. Here's Tao wiping away his fake
tears.
